"A man can receive nothing unless it has been given him from heaven." John 3:27
This was the verse in my devotions the morning of my interview for the President's Scholarship. When I read this, I was overwhelmed by God's loving care in showing me that exact verse that morning. It's a truth I have clung to throughout the weeks of uncertainty following the interview process.
I'm still not 100% sure if I got the scholarship or not, but it looks like I didn't. I got my "financial aid award letter" and there was no mention of the President's Scholarship. However, there was also no mention of the $5000 scholarship I am guaranteed if I don't get the President's Scholarship...so I just don't know what's going on. We're trying to get in contact with Master's to get this and other questions answered.
God is still so very good though. We've been thinking it through, and we really might be able to swing going even if I don't get the President's. We got some financial aid through grants that I didn't think I was going to get and there are other things we can do and are doing. Sometimes when it comes down to something like this, I begin to wonder if I'm truly doing what God wants. I used to say I wasn't going to Master's unless I got the President's, because that would be to me a clear and definite leading. But now that I've visited there twice, I really feel like it's the right place for me to be. So now I'm trying through other ways to make it happen, and I wonder if I'm just wasting energy to get something to happen that isn't going to happen.
Pray that God's leading will be clear and that He will give us unity and peace as we embark on this totally new adventure.
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
From the Midst of Finals Prep
It's finals week...again. This is why I haven't updated, but I got to the point where I couldn't take anymore studying and I just needed to do something different. So here I am, trying to think if I've done anything worth mentioning.
Today Marcie told me that she got her financial aid award stuff from Vanguard and also another of the colleges she got in to. She got so much money...it's awesome. You can probably find out more about it on her Xanga...I'm sure she'll update sometime, even though she hasn't as of yet.
But..."This promotion throws into sharp relief that which I have not yet obtained" (Commodore, Pirates of the Caribbean). I'm about ready to shoot the mailman...even though it's probably not entirely the US Postal Service's fault that I haven't yet gotten a letter from Master's. I find myself feeling sick when the afternoon drags by and the mail has not yet come. People ask me every day, "Have you heard yet?" No, I haven't and I am dying of suspense. But in a way I don't want to know, because I have such a feeling that I didn't get it. It's much more comfortable to tell all these people I haven't heard yet than to tell them I didn't get it. My stupid pride rears its ugly head once again.
It's not all bad in Jillian world though. I had a great weekend, which was highly unproductive in the homework aspects, but extremely fun in the social aspects. I seriously have some of the best friends in the world. God provided exactly the people I need in my life, and I am so thankful. Last weekend, we had times from moments of serious discussion, confession, and tears, to times when the tears came because we were laughing so hard. It was awesome!
My trip to Mexico is approaching rapidly. It's weird because I really haven't had much time to think about it, but we're leaving in 10 days. Think of and pray for me while I'm gone. It's going to be so different from anything I've ever experienced before. I'm excited to see what God teaches me.
You can tell I've been studying too long when my blog entries are like this one. There's no point, I use lots of ellipses...yeah. Finals will be over, and this tired feeling cannot last forever. And then I only have one quarter left! Hard to believe, I know. I really need to bring a camera one of these days so I can record this place for posterity. As stressful as it has been, God has blessed me so much through my time at Whatcom. And I know He will continue to use it in the quarter to come.
Adios, my friends. You probably won't hear from me until after finals and Mexico unless something earthshattering happens. Oh...I'll probably put up a sentence or two when I get my letter from Master's too. Until then, God bless!
Today Marcie told me that she got her financial aid award stuff from Vanguard and also another of the colleges she got in to. She got so much money...it's awesome. You can probably find out more about it on her Xanga...I'm sure she'll update sometime, even though she hasn't as of yet.
But..."This promotion throws into sharp relief that which I have not yet obtained" (Commodore, Pirates of the Caribbean). I'm about ready to shoot the mailman...even though it's probably not entirely the US Postal Service's fault that I haven't yet gotten a letter from Master's. I find myself feeling sick when the afternoon drags by and the mail has not yet come. People ask me every day, "Have you heard yet?" No, I haven't and I am dying of suspense. But in a way I don't want to know, because I have such a feeling that I didn't get it. It's much more comfortable to tell all these people I haven't heard yet than to tell them I didn't get it. My stupid pride rears its ugly head once again.
It's not all bad in Jillian world though. I had a great weekend, which was highly unproductive in the homework aspects, but extremely fun in the social aspects. I seriously have some of the best friends in the world. God provided exactly the people I need in my life, and I am so thankful. Last weekend, we had times from moments of serious discussion, confession, and tears, to times when the tears came because we were laughing so hard. It was awesome!
My trip to Mexico is approaching rapidly. It's weird because I really haven't had much time to think about it, but we're leaving in 10 days. Think of and pray for me while I'm gone. It's going to be so different from anything I've ever experienced before. I'm excited to see what God teaches me.
You can tell I've been studying too long when my blog entries are like this one. There's no point, I use lots of ellipses...yeah. Finals will be over, and this tired feeling cannot last forever. And then I only have one quarter left! Hard to believe, I know. I really need to bring a camera one of these days so I can record this place for posterity. As stressful as it has been, God has blessed me so much through my time at Whatcom. And I know He will continue to use it in the quarter to come.
Adios, my friends. You probably won't hear from me until after finals and Mexico unless something earthshattering happens. Oh...I'll probably put up a sentence or two when I get my letter from Master's too. Until then, God bless!
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
Beauty Is...
...neon lights reflected in a rainy street.
...sunlight streaming through the trees.
...the enormity of the stars.
...smiles of any sort.
...the richness of color.
...flames dancing in a fireplace.
...the sparkle in eyes.
...Boyer Road in any sort of weather.
...roses.
...sunsets or sunrises.
...dancing on the ocean's shore.
...the comfortable, loving feeling at my "grandma's" house.
...a beautifully set table.
...God's grace visualized.
...sunlight streaming through the trees.
...the enormity of the stars.
...smiles of any sort.
...the richness of color.
...flames dancing in a fireplace.
...the sparkle in eyes.
...Boyer Road in any sort of weather.
...roses.
...sunsets or sunrises.
...dancing on the ocean's shore.
...the comfortable, loving feeling at my "grandma's" house.
...a beautifully set table.
...God's grace visualized.
Friday, March 04, 2005
I've Crossed Over to the Dark Side
Yes people, that is right. Jillian Hazel is now a criminal.
It all started out innocently enough. I woke up half an hour late because I was having this insane dream that I had to test the snooze button on all these alarm clocks...not realizing I was really pushing the snooze on my own. I got up, showered and got ready in a hurry, and went upstairs.
By this time, it was the time I normally leave because I couldn't find anything to wear. I tried to grab food as quickly as I could, but the toaster takes some time, and my mom needed to talk to me about my weekend plans. Fifteen minutes late, I walked out the door.
My schedule allows for exactly 15 minutes of flex time between when I should arrive @ Whatcom and when my first class starts. So if I found an immediate parking spot, I wouldn't be too late.
Then I got stuck behind a school bus. On the Guide. It stopped at like every other house...and I couldn't pass it because I was on the Guide. Finally I was able to turn off onto Horton, and then I began flying down Cordata. My class started at 8:30, and it was 8:29.
You can see where this is going, right?
I didn't see the motorcycle cop til it was too late. I looked down at my speedometer...yikes. So, it happened. I got my first ticket. According to my parents, it was inevitable with my lead foot tendencies, but why did it have to happen today of all days?
I was 15 minutes late to my class.
It all started out innocently enough. I woke up half an hour late because I was having this insane dream that I had to test the snooze button on all these alarm clocks...not realizing I was really pushing the snooze on my own. I got up, showered and got ready in a hurry, and went upstairs.
By this time, it was the time I normally leave because I couldn't find anything to wear. I tried to grab food as quickly as I could, but the toaster takes some time, and my mom needed to talk to me about my weekend plans. Fifteen minutes late, I walked out the door.
My schedule allows for exactly 15 minutes of flex time between when I should arrive @ Whatcom and when my first class starts. So if I found an immediate parking spot, I wouldn't be too late.
Then I got stuck behind a school bus. On the Guide. It stopped at like every other house...and I couldn't pass it because I was on the Guide. Finally I was able to turn off onto Horton, and then I began flying down Cordata. My class started at 8:30, and it was 8:29.
You can see where this is going, right?
I didn't see the motorcycle cop til it was too late. I looked down at my speedometer...yikes. So, it happened. I got my first ticket. According to my parents, it was inevitable with my lead foot tendencies, but why did it have to happen today of all days?
I was 15 minutes late to my class.
Thursday, March 03, 2005
La Vida Buena
Usually I'm so good about posts that have a clear theme and subject, but today...today is going to be a conglomeration of other things.
First, and most obvious, I changed how my blog looks. I guess I was just getting tired of the other one. Plus, this one has a smaller font so it looks like I said less, and it has a ready-made links section for your browsing pleasure. I am accepting bribes for any others who want to join the illustrious list to your right. :-) However, it is still green, which is very important somehow. I'm not sure how; I just decided it was.
Maybe I changed because it's spring. I always get a little wanderlust in the spring, and this spring is no different. I'm glad I have my trip to Mexico to temper my excitement. I seriously can't wait to go..we watched a movie and talked with someone from the organization (Stoney Creek Missions) that is sponsoring the trip, and now it just seems that much more real and exciting to me.
Speaking of spring, it is a gorgeous day! I really can't believe I am sitting here in front of a computer typing. Well...OK, not a gorgeous day (this morning was bad), but it's been sunny and it smells like freshly cut grass outside, and the peepers have been out, and it all just makes me really happy! People were studying in the courtyard at Whatcom today, and they could. It wasn't too cold or anything.
To add to my good mood, Squalicum won! They won by a lot too, and they're continuing on, which means I actually might get to see a game if they continue play through Saturday. I really hope they do...I haven't seen a Squalicum game since the one at Ferndale sometime in January.
I wanted to go down to the Tacoma Dome last night, but things just didn't work out. My family left to go to Mount Vernon for 2A districts, and I got the house to myself. This was fine for about 20 minutes, and then I decided I wanted to have a friend over. So I got Brittney and we rented a movie and laughed and made spaghetti and laughed and danced in the kitchen to Phantom of the Opera and laughed..and mostly laughed! Seriously, when we get together, we have the craziest, most fun times...it's awesome.
I got a Phantom of the Opera cd Karin! I'm enjoying it, but I got a weird stare as I was driving through the parking lot with my window rolled down and "Angel of Music" blaring. Oh well. I found this great quote today that says, "To achieve something spectacular, one must sometimes make a spectacle of oneself." I agree!
So people, go out there and make a spectacle of yourselves! It's going to a be a spectacular spring! How do I know? God's had it figured out since the beginning of time. Love y'all!
First, and most obvious, I changed how my blog looks. I guess I was just getting tired of the other one. Plus, this one has a smaller font so it looks like I said less, and it has a ready-made links section for your browsing pleasure. I am accepting bribes for any others who want to join the illustrious list to your right. :-) However, it is still green, which is very important somehow. I'm not sure how; I just decided it was.
Maybe I changed because it's spring. I always get a little wanderlust in the spring, and this spring is no different. I'm glad I have my trip to Mexico to temper my excitement. I seriously can't wait to go..we watched a movie and talked with someone from the organization (Stoney Creek Missions) that is sponsoring the trip, and now it just seems that much more real and exciting to me.
Speaking of spring, it is a gorgeous day! I really can't believe I am sitting here in front of a computer typing. Well...OK, not a gorgeous day (this morning was bad), but it's been sunny and it smells like freshly cut grass outside, and the peepers have been out, and it all just makes me really happy! People were studying in the courtyard at Whatcom today, and they could. It wasn't too cold or anything.
To add to my good mood, Squalicum won! They won by a lot too, and they're continuing on, which means I actually might get to see a game if they continue play through Saturday. I really hope they do...I haven't seen a Squalicum game since the one at Ferndale sometime in January.
I wanted to go down to the Tacoma Dome last night, but things just didn't work out. My family left to go to Mount Vernon for 2A districts, and I got the house to myself. This was fine for about 20 minutes, and then I decided I wanted to have a friend over. So I got Brittney and we rented a movie and laughed and made spaghetti and laughed and danced in the kitchen to Phantom of the Opera and laughed..and mostly laughed! Seriously, when we get together, we have the craziest, most fun times...it's awesome.
I got a Phantom of the Opera cd Karin! I'm enjoying it, but I got a weird stare as I was driving through the parking lot with my window rolled down and "Angel of Music" blaring. Oh well. I found this great quote today that says, "To achieve something spectacular, one must sometimes make a spectacle of oneself." I agree!
So people, go out there and make a spectacle of yourselves! It's going to a be a spectacular spring! How do I know? God's had it figured out since the beginning of time. Love y'all!
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