- What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before? Got pulled over by a cop (no ticket, thankfully!)
- Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? The story behind my New Year’s resolution is a weird one, and the resolution itself was rather lame because it was fulfilled at about 12:38 a.m. on January 1st. I am planning on making a better one next year.
- Did anyone close to you give birth? No
- Did anyone close to you die? Myself…“unless a kernel of wheat falls into the ground and dies…”
- What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004? Contentment
- What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? December 1st, because it’s the day I became an adult
- What was your biggest achievement of the year? Working as a full-time summer missionary and succeeding in my new atmosphere at the community college.
- What was your biggest failure? Every day I failed miserably, falling completely short of God’s perfect standard. At moments I thought I was succeeding, in God’s eyes I was truly failing. Praise be to His marvelous grace that will not let me go!
- Did you suffer illness or injury? It seems I got sick right exactly at the worst time to be sick every quarter. Something to do with the stress…
- What was the best thing you bought? My cowboy hat!
- Whose behavior merited celebration? My faithfully supportive and encouraging friends and family
- Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? My own
- Where did most of your money go? Fixing my car, gas, scrapbooking supplies, clothes, food, gifts, and movies, in that approximate order!
- What did you get really, really, really excited about? Anything I did with my amazing, wonderful friends
- What song will always remind you of 2004? “Dare You to Move” by Switchfoot
- What do you wish you'd done more of? Laughing, learning and loving
- What do you wish you'd done less of? Wanting to cry and not being able to cry
- Did you fall in love in 2004? Deeper every day
- What was the best book you read? The Bible of course, followed by many others tied for second. Of books I read for the first time, probably Desiring God by John Piper
- What was your greatest musical discovery?/new artist for 2004? Big & Rich’s awesome harmonies in “Holy Water”
- What did you want and get? A cd player for my car and more freedom
- What was your favorite film of this year? Spiderman 2
- What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 18, went to a basketball game, and had a surprise birthday in the shop
- What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Deeper faith in God and His perfect control
- How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004? Jeans, t-shirts, and beginning to lean towards skirts and sweaters. Innumerable coats/sweatshirts and any pair of flip-flops that struck my fancy :-)
- What kept you sane? My God and my family, and some of my friends. The other ones kept me insane, and some did both. :-)
- What political issue stirred you the most? The presidential election, abortion and gay marriage
- Who did you miss? Different people at different times
- Who was the best new person you met? The best completely new person was Jenny Harley, but I also enjoyed renewing old friendships with Jessica Quimby and my “Prom Friends” (as my siblings call them)
- Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004: God knows all my moments--past, present and future--and loves me immeasurably. He wants me to be holy and happy, two things which are NOT mutually exclusive. Only through following His perfect way am I truly happy.
- Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: “I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful, beautiful life!” Daryl Worley
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
Reflections on 2004
Tuesday, December 21, 2004
So Girlie
Today I get to babysit the Parks! I am so excited! I love these kids and told the Parks that I am more than willing to adopt them if anything should ever happen. For some reason, when I am babysitting them, I just feel right. I've even babysat them for extended periods of time (like over a weekend) and still wasn't tired of it.
One of the reasons I love babysitting them is because they are already developing great character even at 6, 4, and 2. Their parents have been training them in God's ways from birth, and it shines through. No, they're not perfect, but they are so much sweeter, well-behaved, and polite than the products of non-Christian homes that I sit for. Already the Parks kids are being trained in the Biblical roles of men and women. Last week they came over to our house and we played many games with them. One of them was Polly Pockets, but after a couple of minutes Job looked up at us and asked "Is this...very girlie?"
"Well, sort of," Lydia replied. Job wandered off, in search of a less "girlie" pursuit.
Lona, however, giggled to herself and said, "It's girlie!" as a pleased grin spread across her face.
Job and Isaac turned to playing superheroes, and eventually returned to where Lona was. Job began to use his "superpowers" to render her immobile, but Isaac stopped him. "Job!" he said. "We're not supposed to attack Lona, we're supposed to protect her!" What a change from my feministic college courses where we discussed gender influence on children and the policy of giving a child (whether boy or girl) a doll and a car for Christmas. No such politically correct nonsense is going on in the Parks household!
One of the reasons I love babysitting them is because they are already developing great character even at 6, 4, and 2. Their parents have been training them in God's ways from birth, and it shines through. No, they're not perfect, but they are so much sweeter, well-behaved, and polite than the products of non-Christian homes that I sit for. Already the Parks kids are being trained in the Biblical roles of men and women. Last week they came over to our house and we played many games with them. One of them was Polly Pockets, but after a couple of minutes Job looked up at us and asked "Is this...very girlie?"
"Well, sort of," Lydia replied. Job wandered off, in search of a less "girlie" pursuit.
Lona, however, giggled to herself and said, "It's girlie!" as a pleased grin spread across her face.
Job and Isaac turned to playing superheroes, and eventually returned to where Lona was. Job began to use his "superpowers" to render her immobile, but Isaac stopped him. "Job!" he said. "We're not supposed to attack Lona, we're supposed to protect her!" What a change from my feministic college courses where we discussed gender influence on children and the policy of giving a child (whether boy or girl) a doll and a car for Christmas. No such politically correct nonsense is going on in the Parks household!
Thursday, December 16, 2004
Country Girl in the Big City
I love living in the country. The scenery, the freedom to take long, wandering walks through fields and woods, and the open spaces all are reasons I am glad we live on one acre right between all the major towns in our county. I love that we live on a tree-lined gravel road, and that about twenty dogs and numerous other animals live on this short, dead-end road of 11 houses. I love how the air smells and how all the neighbors grumble when an unsuspecting visitor goes 30 down the road. I am so glad we live out here!
And yet at times I think that I am not a true country girl because of how I love my occasional expeditions into the city. Yesterday I took the train to Seattle with my mom and my two youngest siblings, and I had so much fun! The supposed goal of our trip was some christmas shopping, but we really didn't get much of that done at all. I spent too much time marveling at the sights and sounds to realize that I had shopping to do.
In Seattle, we used public transportation four times, which is four times more than I use it in a typical year! The bus is still something that scares me, and it is one of the reasons I want to take my car to college. But we survived our bus trips, and we even survived walking around downtown Seattle. My favorite part was when we left the mall and major retail area of downtown, and walked a few blocks to Pike Place Market. There was a string quartet made up of college students who were absolutely wonderful! I could have listened to them for such a long time...but there were others in the group than me and I had to leave after they'd played 2 songs.
When I'm on adventures, the artist in me comes to the forefront. I kept finding perfect photos or paintings...in the arrangement of produce at a stand, in how a tree touched the sky, in old little alleys and in the people around me. Oh, how I wished I had brought a camera! Or even someone who could share that simple beauty with me; my siblings were too busy with other things and just looked at me funny when I would say, "Isn't that cool?!?" If you've ever read and understood Wordsworth's poem "Tinturn Abbey," you know what I mean when I say that "in this moment there is life and food for future years."
And yet at times I think that I am not a true country girl because of how I love my occasional expeditions into the city. Yesterday I took the train to Seattle with my mom and my two youngest siblings, and I had so much fun! The supposed goal of our trip was some christmas shopping, but we really didn't get much of that done at all. I spent too much time marveling at the sights and sounds to realize that I had shopping to do.
In Seattle, we used public transportation four times, which is four times more than I use it in a typical year! The bus is still something that scares me, and it is one of the reasons I want to take my car to college. But we survived our bus trips, and we even survived walking around downtown Seattle. My favorite part was when we left the mall and major retail area of downtown, and walked a few blocks to Pike Place Market. There was a string quartet made up of college students who were absolutely wonderful! I could have listened to them for such a long time...but there were others in the group than me and I had to leave after they'd played 2 songs.
When I'm on adventures, the artist in me comes to the forefront. I kept finding perfect photos or paintings...in the arrangement of produce at a stand, in how a tree touched the sky, in old little alleys and in the people around me. Oh, how I wished I had brought a camera! Or even someone who could share that simple beauty with me; my siblings were too busy with other things and just looked at me funny when I would say, "Isn't that cool?!?" If you've ever read and understood Wordsworth's poem "Tinturn Abbey," you know what I mean when I say that "in this moment there is life and food for future years."
Friday, December 10, 2004
The Newest Bard(s)
"Jill, you do something crazy every day," my little brother once told me, and it's true! You can never tell what sort of crazy thing I am going to do next.
Yesterday was my last day of school for the quarter! My mom took me out to Mexican food to celebrate and then we went to The College Store in Sehome Village to see if one of the books I need for next quarter was there. It wasn't, and neither was the book my mom was looking for, but I did find the coolest thing I've bought for myself in recent history.
The College Store had an entire shelf of Magnetic Poetry, which are those individual magnetic words you string together to form crazy and random, deep and wise, or just plain interesting sentences. After much deliberation, I chose the Shakepeare version because there are such interesting words in it, and you get to use "thee" and "thou."
Jacob, Lydia and I were all really excited about it and immediately went home and cleared of the top half of our fridge. When Caleb and Audrey got home from school, we were crowded around our fridge, pondering what words of wisdom and nonsense we could form. They both gave us odd looks, and Caleb said one of his characteristic comments about how strange I am. I always tell him it's for his own good. His life would be so dull without me! At least that's what think. He seems to think it would be more sane.
But I digress.
Eventually we had created many gems, and I wanted to share some of the best (& worst) here.
Yesterday was my last day of school for the quarter! My mom took me out to Mexican food to celebrate and then we went to The College Store in Sehome Village to see if one of the books I need for next quarter was there. It wasn't, and neither was the book my mom was looking for, but I did find the coolest thing I've bought for myself in recent history.
The College Store had an entire shelf of Magnetic Poetry, which are those individual magnetic words you string together to form crazy and random, deep and wise, or just plain interesting sentences. After much deliberation, I chose the Shakepeare version because there are such interesting words in it, and you get to use "thee" and "thou."
Jacob, Lydia and I were all really excited about it and immediately went home and cleared of the top half of our fridge. When Caleb and Audrey got home from school, we were crowded around our fridge, pondering what words of wisdom and nonsense we could form. They both gave us odd looks, and Caleb said one of his characteristic comments about how strange I am. I always tell him it's for his own good. His life would be so dull without me! At least that's what think. He seems to think it would be more sane.
But I digress.
Eventually we had created many gems, and I wanted to share some of the best (& worst) here.
methinks I am drunk (Lydia)
maiden discontent & melancholy thou art lazy (Lydia w/a little input from me)
what manner of grace hath woo'd her (Me)
why dost every belch make woman say farewell (Unknown)
a bosom friend always gives light in ghostly night (Audrey)
Wednesday, December 08, 2004
"Apostle to the Skeptics" and Refreshment to my Faith
Amidst all the insanity of finals week, I have been doing something equally insane. I checked out two C.S. Lewis books from our school library and am attempting to read them before they are due back at the end of the quarter. One is finished, and I am about halfway through the other. My study time has suffered, my sleep time has suffered, but my mind and soul have been so richly blessed!
I love reading C.S. Lewis because he writes the type of books that I cannot just breeze through; I have to take my time and digest each sentence. And because it takes longer, I get much more out of it. He is the type of author who makes me go "huh?" and shows me how my faith makes sense. I never saw Christianity as so beautifully logical before I began reading his books. I also never saw it as so full of joy and beauty.
The beautiful logic that I see has encouraged my faith and given me boldness. My faith is not simply blind faith; God has left incredible evidence for His existence, "so that men are without excuse."
And I have even learned things about my writing.
His fiction (The Space Trilogy, Chronicles of Narnia, Til We Have Faces) can send chills down my back and transport me to worlds I never knew I always imagined. His satire (The Screwtape Letters) can make me laugh...and then ponder my life and sins. No, he's not perfect, and no, I don't agree with every idea. But I have learned so much about my God and my faith that all the wasted sleep and lost study time are worth it.
I love reading C.S. Lewis because he writes the type of books that I cannot just breeze through; I have to take my time and digest each sentence. And because it takes longer, I get much more out of it. He is the type of author who makes me go "huh?" and shows me how my faith makes sense. I never saw Christianity as so beautifully logical before I began reading his books. I also never saw it as so full of joy and beauty.
I sometimes wonder whether all pleasures are not substitutes for joy. C. S. Lewis
The beautiful logic that I see has encouraged my faith and given me boldness. My faith is not simply blind faith; God has left incredible evidence for His existence, "so that men are without excuse."
If the whole universe has no meaning, we should never have found out that it has no meaning: just as, if there were no light in the universe and therefore no creatures with eyes, we should never know it was dark. Dark would be without meaning. C. S. Lewis
And I have even learned things about my writing.
Don't say it was "delightful"; make us say "delightful" when we've read the description. You see, all those words (horrifying, wonderful, hideous, exquisite) are only like saying to your readers "Please will you do the job for me." C. S. Lewis
His fiction (The Space Trilogy, Chronicles of Narnia, Til We Have Faces) can send chills down my back and transport me to worlds I never knew I always imagined. His satire (The Screwtape Letters) can make me laugh...and then ponder my life and sins. No, he's not perfect, and no, I don't agree with every idea. But I have learned so much about my God and my faith that all the wasted sleep and lost study time are worth it.
Monday, December 06, 2004
Surprised?
...not really. :-)
My mom was so insistent that I wasn't allowed to have a party for my eighteenth birthday that I was almost sure she was trying to throw a surprise party. Then on Thursday night my family started getting weird. OK, so they're already weird (aren't all families?), but they managed to get weird-er. I'm a pretty smart girl, so I was able to figure out exactly when and where the party was going to be. The only thing left to surprise me was who was invited, and even that didn't surprise me much.
A family from our church came over "for dinner" and then my sister and the two oldest girls in that family took me to my room with strict instructions to keep me there. People began arriving and were ushered through the house and out the back door to the shop. My dog even started barking and everyone began shouting different things. Some said it was the neighbor boy, others said it was our little sisters ringing the doorbell. Uh-huh.
Finally my dad came down and said, "Do you girls want to watch us play ping-ping?" Yeah right Dad. There's a bunch of people out there and they're all going to yell "SURPRISE!" and embarrass me, etc, etc. But I played along. I seriously considered saying, "No, I don't think I want to go watch you guys. It's too cold and I'm really tired. In fact, what I really want to do is sleep." Oh, how that would have made them panic. Already the three other girls were practically hysterical from giddiness.
I did make them freak out just a little more by taking forever to find a jacket that matched my shirt. I tore our laundry room, coat closet, my brother's closet and my closet upside down until I finally found one that would "have to do." By this time they were basically dragging me out the door.
Everything went just as I predicted. I seriously think it would have been almost impossible for them to actually surprise me.
There were a lot of people there and I felt like the whole thing went so quickly. I didn't even get a chance to talk to everyone, which made me kind of upset. Oh well, I guess I'll have to talk to them later. I felt like the proverbial butterfly, flitting from conversation to conversation. Even still, I had fun. The worst thing was Mom making me open my presents with everyone watching. It felt like a baby shower or something, and I just felt really uncomfortable. I got so much stuff! The next day it took me a long time to put it all away. But the best present I got was a single red rose from my "grandparents." I had been hoping I would get a rose, and it almost made me cry because I knew that my grandma had known how much I love roses. It sits on my desk, reminding me of how much they love me and how well they know me. I'm about to cry just thinking about it!
God has given me such awesome friends. His love for me is so apparent through their love for me. I am so grateful that I get to spend this next year with them!
My mom was so insistent that I wasn't allowed to have a party for my eighteenth birthday that I was almost sure she was trying to throw a surprise party. Then on Thursday night my family started getting weird. OK, so they're already weird (aren't all families?), but they managed to get weird-er. I'm a pretty smart girl, so I was able to figure out exactly when and where the party was going to be. The only thing left to surprise me was who was invited, and even that didn't surprise me much.
A family from our church came over "for dinner" and then my sister and the two oldest girls in that family took me to my room with strict instructions to keep me there. People began arriving and were ushered through the house and out the back door to the shop. My dog even started barking and everyone began shouting different things. Some said it was the neighbor boy, others said it was our little sisters ringing the doorbell. Uh-huh.
Finally my dad came down and said, "Do you girls want to watch us play ping-ping?" Yeah right Dad. There's a bunch of people out there and they're all going to yell "SURPRISE!" and embarrass me, etc, etc. But I played along. I seriously considered saying, "No, I don't think I want to go watch you guys. It's too cold and I'm really tired. In fact, what I really want to do is sleep." Oh, how that would have made them panic. Already the three other girls were practically hysterical from giddiness.
I did make them freak out just a little more by taking forever to find a jacket that matched my shirt. I tore our laundry room, coat closet, my brother's closet and my closet upside down until I finally found one that would "have to do." By this time they were basically dragging me out the door.
Everything went just as I predicted. I seriously think it would have been almost impossible for them to actually surprise me.
There were a lot of people there and I felt like the whole thing went so quickly. I didn't even get a chance to talk to everyone, which made me kind of upset. Oh well, I guess I'll have to talk to them later. I felt like the proverbial butterfly, flitting from conversation to conversation. Even still, I had fun. The worst thing was Mom making me open my presents with everyone watching. It felt like a baby shower or something, and I just felt really uncomfortable. I got so much stuff! The next day it took me a long time to put it all away. But the best present I got was a single red rose from my "grandparents." I had been hoping I would get a rose, and it almost made me cry because I knew that my grandma had known how much I love roses. It sits on my desk, reminding me of how much they love me and how well they know me. I'm about to cry just thinking about it!
God has given me such awesome friends. His love for me is so apparent through their love for me. I am so grateful that I get to spend this next year with them!
Friday, December 03, 2004
Life as I Know It
Life gets so crazy sometimes.
I meant to post a deep, reflective blog on my eigthteenth birthday--my"entrance to adulthood"--but I never had the time. With finals so quickly approaching and so many other things calling for my attention, I never got time enough to post.
Then yesterday, my car broke down. Again. I had gone to pick up some carseats from a woman I babysit for, and, on my way back to the college, my car started doing funny things. I called my dad and he told me to park somewhere and get my mom to follow me over to his shop. So I got to the college parking lot, and it died right there. There were no parking spots anywhere close, so I went off in search of help. Two of my friends from church helped me (big thank you to Aaron and Nathan if they ever read this, which is unlikely) and we pulled one of their cars out and then pushed my car into the spot. It sat there all night, and sometime today it was hopefully towed to my dad's shop. I checked at 10:30 and it was still there, but I'm hoping it's been towed by now. I feel so helpless without my car!
I've also been really busy with schoolwork...it seems like everything comes to a peak at finals week and then it drops off into nothing and I don't know what to do with myself. Hopefully that will not be the case during this break: I mean to do many productive things with my precious four weeks of "free" time. Like applying for scholarships. Ahhh!!!
My application to The Master's College was sent off in mid November, and now I'm eagerly checking the mail for a reply. My mom has strict instructions not to open anything on Master's stationery, "lest she die." I can hardly wait to get one step closer to actually going! It's so exciting...and terrifying at the same time. I am so grateful for my belief in God's sovereignty. If I didn't have that to hold onto, I'm sure my perfectionist, oldest child, I've-got-everything-under-control nature would go completely insane!
Such has been my life for the past week, and I am so grateful for the change that is sure to come. I'm about done with all this stress!
I meant to post a deep, reflective blog on my eigthteenth birthday--my"entrance to adulthood"--but I never had the time. With finals so quickly approaching and so many other things calling for my attention, I never got time enough to post.
Then yesterday, my car broke down. Again. I had gone to pick up some carseats from a woman I babysit for, and, on my way back to the college, my car started doing funny things. I called my dad and he told me to park somewhere and get my mom to follow me over to his shop. So I got to the college parking lot, and it died right there. There were no parking spots anywhere close, so I went off in search of help. Two of my friends from church helped me (big thank you to Aaron and Nathan if they ever read this, which is unlikely) and we pulled one of their cars out and then pushed my car into the spot. It sat there all night, and sometime today it was hopefully towed to my dad's shop. I checked at 10:30 and it was still there, but I'm hoping it's been towed by now. I feel so helpless without my car!
I've also been really busy with schoolwork...it seems like everything comes to a peak at finals week and then it drops off into nothing and I don't know what to do with myself. Hopefully that will not be the case during this break: I mean to do many productive things with my precious four weeks of "free" time. Like applying for scholarships. Ahhh!!!
My application to The Master's College was sent off in mid November, and now I'm eagerly checking the mail for a reply. My mom has strict instructions not to open anything on Master's stationery, "lest she die." I can hardly wait to get one step closer to actually going! It's so exciting...and terrifying at the same time. I am so grateful for my belief in God's sovereignty. If I didn't have that to hold onto, I'm sure my perfectionist, oldest child, I've-got-everything-under-control nature would go completely insane!
Such has been my life for the past week, and I am so grateful for the change that is sure to come. I'm about done with all this stress!
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
God of the Details
The words I just keep repeating over and over to myself are, "God is sovereign...He reigns over all. A sparrow cannot fall..."
Yesterday I learned of two deaths. One was the apparent suicide of the friend of a friend, the other was an older relative of my Lummi kids. Every Tuesday, a group of us teens go teach a Good News Club on the Lummi Indian reservation. Yesterday when Mandy and I got there, there was a note saying there had been a death in the family. Mandy and I left the food basket we had brought for them, and then I looked for something to write a note back on. God truly is the God of the details...I had left a card in my backpack on accident that was just perfect for the occasion. We wrote on it, and then left.
On our way out, we saw some people standing in the nearly dark road and waving. We were able to help them get gas and jump their car, and we found out that they were relatives of the people who host the Good News Club. Even though we thought our trip out to the reservation (30 minutes both ways) had been useless, we found that God had a different plan for us. This was such a comfort to me as I had been wrestling all day with the suicide...God showed me that He was still, as always, in complete and perfect control.
Yesterday I learned of two deaths. One was the apparent suicide of the friend of a friend, the other was an older relative of my Lummi kids. Every Tuesday, a group of us teens go teach a Good News Club on the Lummi Indian reservation. Yesterday when Mandy and I got there, there was a note saying there had been a death in the family. Mandy and I left the food basket we had brought for them, and then I looked for something to write a note back on. God truly is the God of the details...I had left a card in my backpack on accident that was just perfect for the occasion. We wrote on it, and then left.
On our way out, we saw some people standing in the nearly dark road and waving. We were able to help them get gas and jump their car, and we found out that they were relatives of the people who host the Good News Club. Even though we thought our trip out to the reservation (30 minutes both ways) had been useless, we found that God had a different plan for us. This was such a comfort to me as I had been wrestling all day with the suicide...God showed me that He was still, as always, in complete and perfect control.
Friday, November 19, 2004
Pieces of Me
Kimi sent this to me and I decided to publish it as a sort of odd profile on me
1. FIRST NAME: Jillian
2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Some one in a Canadian soap opera...but I was almost named Chloe after a perfume. Yeah.
3. DO YOU WISH ON STARS? :-) Of course
4. WHICH FINGER IS YOUR FAVORITE? My thumbs 'cause they're opposable and because of them I can do all sorts of cool things. They're also really cute.
5. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? Yesterday, talking to my mom and then later in my bed. *Sniff*
6. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Sure, I've worked hard to make it how it is, I'd better like it.
7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Turkey
8. ANY BAD HABITS? So many I can't even begin to list them
9. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF? I don't buy embarrassing CD's
10. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Maybe after awhile
11. ARE YOU A DAREDEVIL? In certain instances...
12. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL? :-) Let me think...Maybe, but I can't recall. Did I get sworn to secrecy on that one or not?
13. DO LOOKS MATTER? Theoreticly no
14. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER? Drive really fast and listen to hard rock
15. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME? My grandma Bonita's house
16. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY? Not really
17. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? My Playmobile
18. WHAT CLASS IN SCHOOL DO YOU THINK IS TOTALLY USELESS? Library 101. Seriously Caleb, why do you take it?
19. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? Yes, but I'm not very good at keeping up on it.
20. DO YOU USE SARCASM? Is the grass green?
21. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT? I don't think so...
22. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GAL/GUY? A sweet, theologically sound cowboy who loves God more than he loves me...and some other things I just won't mention
23. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES? Seriously people, why do you always ask this question? All my nicknames are SO stupid!
24. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Definitely...but it might take me a while to get up the nerve
25. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Never
26. DO YOU THINK THAT YOU ARE STRONG? Sure...:-)
27. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? Kimi: "What's ice cream?" Yeah right hon...you eat it all the time! Remember, that really yummy stuff we put peanut butter on?
28 . WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS? Almost any color
29. WHAT DO YOU LOVE ABOUT YOUR CRUSH? Mostly it's the ways I see Jesus in him
30. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE? You know, it's amazing how I can be so wise without any wisdom teeth
31. WHO DO YOU MISS MOST RIGHT NOW? Jenny Harley
32. LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The quiet sounds of the library
33. LAST THING YOU ATE? An orange
34. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Brittney :-)
35. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX? Height
36. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Of course! You know I love you Kimi!
37. HOW ARE YOU TODAY? Slightly melancholy and tired, but resting in the promises with a bright outlook on my future (OK, that just made no sense.)
38. FAVORITE LAST NAME? Ditto Kimi: "that would be giving to much away", although I LOVE my own last name.
39. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK? I really couldn't tell you...although when Rachel and I are old enough, we're going to order alcoholic beverages sometime just for the fun of it. Don't worry, we will NOT get drunk! We just want to see how they taste...
40. FAVORITE SPORTS? I've answered this question so many times I could scream! See previous surveys
41. HAIR COLOR? Blonde
42. EYE COLOR? Green
43. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Yep, I'm not a wussy like Caleb (JK)
44. SIBLINGS? Yes. Budda, Roo, Bit, and Nelly
45. FAVORITE MONTH? September. Just the name alone is magical!
46. FAVORITE FOOD? I don't know
47. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Home on the Range with the Parks yesterday.
48. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? I love your answer Kimi: "Tomorrow"! That's awesome!
49. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT? The guy should ALWAYS be the initiator
50. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings!
51. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer. :-) Last summer, I had the time of my life! Almost every moment was perfect...and every memory is sweet
52. HUGS OR KISSES? Either...but both at the same time :-)
53. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS? That is such a lame question and anyone who replies "One night stands" needs a serious sermon from me.
54. WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Caleb since I got this from Kimi in the first place
55. WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Kimi since she sent it to me
56. BOOKS YOU ARE READING? I just finished "A Severe Mercy" by Sheldon Vanuaken. It was so good! Now I'm looking for some C.S. Lewis
57. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? On this one, it's WCC colors, baby!
58. FAVORITE BOARD GAME? :-) I love board games.
59. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Nothing, I read a really cute Christian fiction book to unwind rather than unwinding mindlessly
60. FAVORITE SMELLS? Anything that brings back a good memory
61. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP? "Where's the alarm?" and then I roll onto my back and smile at the ceiling.
62. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH? Maybe...I'm still deciding on the appropriate definition
63. ARE YOU HAPPY WITH LIFE RIGHT NOW? God reigns over all and all my seconds are in His hands. "How can I keep from singing?"
1. FIRST NAME: Jillian
2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Some one in a Canadian soap opera...but I was almost named Chloe after a perfume. Yeah.
3. DO YOU WISH ON STARS? :-) Of course
4. WHICH FINGER IS YOUR FAVORITE? My thumbs 'cause they're opposable and because of them I can do all sorts of cool things. They're also really cute.
5. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? Yesterday, talking to my mom and then later in my bed. *Sniff*
6. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Sure, I've worked hard to make it how it is, I'd better like it.
7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Turkey
8. ANY BAD HABITS? So many I can't even begin to list them
9. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF? I don't buy embarrassing CD's
10. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Maybe after awhile
11. ARE YOU A DAREDEVIL? In certain instances...
12. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL? :-) Let me think...Maybe, but I can't recall. Did I get sworn to secrecy on that one or not?
13. DO LOOKS MATTER? Theoreticly no
14. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER? Drive really fast and listen to hard rock
15. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME? My grandma Bonita's house
16. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY? Not really
17. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? My Playmobile
18. WHAT CLASS IN SCHOOL DO YOU THINK IS TOTALLY USELESS? Library 101. Seriously Caleb, why do you take it?
19. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? Yes, but I'm not very good at keeping up on it.
20. DO YOU USE SARCASM? Is the grass green?
21. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT? I don't think so...
22. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GAL/GUY? A sweet, theologically sound cowboy who loves God more than he loves me...and some other things I just won't mention
23. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES? Seriously people, why do you always ask this question? All my nicknames are SO stupid!
24. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Definitely...but it might take me a while to get up the nerve
25. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Never
26. DO YOU THINK THAT YOU ARE STRONG? Sure...:-)
27. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? Kimi: "What's ice cream?" Yeah right hon...you eat it all the time! Remember, that really yummy stuff we put peanut butter on?
28 . WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS? Almost any color
29. WHAT DO YOU LOVE ABOUT YOUR CRUSH? Mostly it's the ways I see Jesus in him
30. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE? You know, it's amazing how I can be so wise without any wisdom teeth
31. WHO DO YOU MISS MOST RIGHT NOW? Jenny Harley
32. LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The quiet sounds of the library
33. LAST THING YOU ATE? An orange
34. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Brittney :-)
35. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX? Height
36. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Of course! You know I love you Kimi!
37. HOW ARE YOU TODAY? Slightly melancholy and tired, but resting in the promises with a bright outlook on my future (OK, that just made no sense.)
38. FAVORITE LAST NAME? Ditto Kimi: "that would be giving to much away", although I LOVE my own last name.
39. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK? I really couldn't tell you...although when Rachel and I are old enough, we're going to order alcoholic beverages sometime just for the fun of it. Don't worry, we will NOT get drunk! We just want to see how they taste...
40. FAVORITE SPORTS? I've answered this question so many times I could scream! See previous surveys
41. HAIR COLOR? Blonde
42. EYE COLOR? Green
43. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Yep, I'm not a wussy like Caleb (JK)
44. SIBLINGS? Yes. Budda, Roo, Bit, and Nelly
45. FAVORITE MONTH? September. Just the name alone is magical!
46. FAVORITE FOOD? I don't know
47. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Home on the Range with the Parks yesterday.
48. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? I love your answer Kimi: "Tomorrow"! That's awesome!
49. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT? The guy should ALWAYS be the initiator
50. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings!
51. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer. :-) Last summer, I had the time of my life! Almost every moment was perfect...and every memory is sweet
52. HUGS OR KISSES? Either...but both at the same time :-)
53. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS? That is such a lame question and anyone who replies "One night stands" needs a serious sermon from me.
54. WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Caleb since I got this from Kimi in the first place
55. WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Kimi since she sent it to me
56. BOOKS YOU ARE READING? I just finished "A Severe Mercy" by Sheldon Vanuaken. It was so good! Now I'm looking for some C.S. Lewis
57. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? On this one, it's WCC colors, baby!
58. FAVORITE BOARD GAME? :-) I love board games.
59. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Nothing, I read a really cute Christian fiction book to unwind rather than unwinding mindlessly
60. FAVORITE SMELLS? Anything that brings back a good memory
61. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP? "Where's the alarm?" and then I roll onto my back and smile at the ceiling.
62. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH? Maybe...I'm still deciding on the appropriate definition
63. ARE YOU HAPPY WITH LIFE RIGHT NOW? God reigns over all and all my seconds are in His hands. "How can I keep from singing?"
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
Blown Away
One of the reasons fall is my favorite season is because of the wind. Especially when it's a warm wind. On Sunday night, there was exactly my favorite kind of wind blowing, and I just couldn't stay inside.
One of the reasons my best friend is my best friend is because she doesn't mind when I have crazy ideas. When I grabbed her after evening service at our church and said, "Let's go out in the wind," she was game. And so we ran outside, into the parking lot, and went crazy.
Yeah, it's kind of weird to see two highschool girls whirling around like dervishes in a church parking lot, but, at that point, I didn't care. We spun in circles, ran as fast as we could, or just stood there with our arms outstretched, hoping the wind would pick us up and carry us away. At that moment, it didn't matter to us if our hair got messed up or people thought we were crazy--we were simply caught up in that timeless moment. It was like we were little children again; children who laugh simply because they'd never known how delightful grass feels on bare feet or how magical it feels when snowflakes fall on your face. And we did laugh!
Finally, we ran back into the church building. Another girl asked me, "Isn't it windy? I hate how it messes everything up." I just looked at her and laughed inside. Sure, my hair probably looked like a mad scientist's, but what did it matter? I had just done something I'd waited all year to do: dance in the wind.
I've been trying to figure out why I love the wind so much. One of the things I found that I loved was a quote from the movie "A Walk to Remember." On their first official date, Landon asks Jaime why she believes what she believes. Jaime turns into the wind, smiles, and answers, "It's like the wind...I can't see it, but I can feel it." I loved that explanation for the reality of God, but I took it a step further. I can't see it, but I can feel it and I can see its effects on the world around me. And the effects and feelings are so powerful, I can't help but believe.
One of the reasons my best friend is my best friend is because she doesn't mind when I have crazy ideas. When I grabbed her after evening service at our church and said, "Let's go out in the wind," she was game. And so we ran outside, into the parking lot, and went crazy.
Yeah, it's kind of weird to see two highschool girls whirling around like dervishes in a church parking lot, but, at that point, I didn't care. We spun in circles, ran as fast as we could, or just stood there with our arms outstretched, hoping the wind would pick us up and carry us away. At that moment, it didn't matter to us if our hair got messed up or people thought we were crazy--we were simply caught up in that timeless moment. It was like we were little children again; children who laugh simply because they'd never known how delightful grass feels on bare feet or how magical it feels when snowflakes fall on your face. And we did laugh!
Finally, we ran back into the church building. Another girl asked me, "Isn't it windy? I hate how it messes everything up." I just looked at her and laughed inside. Sure, my hair probably looked like a mad scientist's, but what did it matter? I had just done something I'd waited all year to do: dance in the wind.
I've been trying to figure out why I love the wind so much. One of the things I found that I loved was a quote from the movie "A Walk to Remember." On their first official date, Landon asks Jaime why she believes what she believes. Jaime turns into the wind, smiles, and answers, "It's like the wind...I can't see it, but I can feel it." I loved that explanation for the reality of God, but I took it a step further. I can't see it, but I can feel it and I can see its effects on the world around me. And the effects and feelings are so powerful, I can't help but believe.
Friday, November 12, 2004
Sixteen Candles
Tonight my little (well, if 6-3 can be called little) brother will celebrate his sixteenth birthday. It wasn't that long ago that I passed the same milestone...and I still remember it well. Our parties will be completely different: mine was a small sleepover with four friends at my grandma's house, while his includes about 50 kids in our shop in the backyard.
It seems fitting that it should be that way...Caleb is "Mr. Popular" who thrives in large groups, while I prefer an intimate relationship with fewer people.
It's amazing to me how time has flown. It seems so recently that we would be found most often playing dress-up, Lincoln Logs, Playmobile or Legos in the rec room...but now we've grown up and he wouldn't be caught playing dress-up with me. :-) But in some ways he's still the little kid with the crazy white hair riding madly around on Grandma's deck with me in a tricycle built for two. He still has crazy hair...although now he spends time to make it look that way. He still loves to tease me...and he still does it well. But most of all, he's still my little brother who I laugh with, cry over, and have the time of my life with. Time has changed so much--I no longer am inches taller--but not the fact that I love him with all my heart. Caleb, I hope you have a birthday to remember...and I pray that you will have a blessed seventeenth year. Don't kill yourself on the roads, now!
It seems fitting that it should be that way...Caleb is "Mr. Popular" who thrives in large groups, while I prefer an intimate relationship with fewer people.
It's amazing to me how time has flown. It seems so recently that we would be found most often playing dress-up, Lincoln Logs, Playmobile or Legos in the rec room...but now we've grown up and he wouldn't be caught playing dress-up with me. :-) But in some ways he's still the little kid with the crazy white hair riding madly around on Grandma's deck with me in a tricycle built for two. He still has crazy hair...although now he spends time to make it look that way. He still loves to tease me...and he still does it well. But most of all, he's still my little brother who I laugh with, cry over, and have the time of my life with. Time has changed so much--I no longer am inches taller--but not the fact that I love him with all my heart. Caleb, I hope you have a birthday to remember...and I pray that you will have a blessed seventeenth year. Don't kill yourself on the roads, now!
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
Wait
A poem that has blessed me lately...even though at least two different friends find it depressing.
Desperately, helplessly, longingly I cried,
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I plead and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child you must wait."
"Wait? You say, wait!" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is Your hand shortened? Or have You not heard?
By faith, I have asked, and am claiming Your Word.
My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and You tell me to WAIT?
I'm needing a 'Yes,' a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'No" to which I can resign.
And Lord, You promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
'I'm weary of asking! I need a reply!'"
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, "You must wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, "So I'm waiting..for what?"
He seemed, then, to kneel, and His eyes wept with mine,
And He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want--but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not the depth of my love for each saint;
You'd not know the power I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there;
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me;
When clouds and darkness were all you could see.
You'd never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
You'd know that I give and I save, for a start,
but you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have last.
You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that 'My grace is sufficient for thee.'
Yes, your dreams for your loved one overnight would come true,
But, Oh the Loss! If I lost what I'm doing in you!
So be silent, My child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though oft' may my answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, 'Wait'"
Desperately, helplessly, longingly I cried,
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I plead and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child you must wait."
"Wait? You say, wait!" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is Your hand shortened? Or have You not heard?
By faith, I have asked, and am claiming Your Word.
My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and You tell me to WAIT?
I'm needing a 'Yes,' a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'No" to which I can resign.
And Lord, You promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
'I'm weary of asking! I need a reply!'"
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, "You must wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, "So I'm waiting..for what?"
He seemed, then, to kneel, and His eyes wept with mine,
And He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want--but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not the depth of my love for each saint;
You'd not know the power I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there;
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me;
When clouds and darkness were all you could see.
You'd never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
You'd know that I give and I save, for a start,
but you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have last.
You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that 'My grace is sufficient for thee.'
Yes, your dreams for your loved one overnight would come true,
But, Oh the Loss! If I lost what I'm doing in you!
So be silent, My child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though oft' may my answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, 'Wait'"
Friday, October 29, 2004
Freedom of Speech
Today I was sitting at a table by window finishing up my lunch when people started gathering in the courtyard outside. They were mostly older and middle aged people, and they were all carrying huge signs. As they set their signs up, I realized with a jolt what they were. Almost every poster had a huge picture of an aborted baby.
My stomach turned and I put my spoon down. How can you eat when you're looking at a bloody head held in a pair of tongs? Tears began welling up in my eyes as I watched.
I was situated in a perfect spot. The protesters were out the window to my right, directly in front of me were the stairs coming down from classrooms and the student lounge, and to my left was the cafeteria with student coming in and out with their lunches. I was able to see the reactions of everyone as their vision was assaulted by those horrible images. Some, like me, looked to be on the verge of tears and turned from their lunches in disgust. Others were outraged, and asked,"What are those people doing here?" I even heard a few attempts at jokes, but it was no laughing matter. These pictures showed everyone the true outcome of abortion: a dead baby.
A crowd began to gather near the people. Many argued with them, but others turned their heads as they passed. They couldn't deal with the atrociousness of it, so they "passed by on the other side."
I couldn't decide what to think. I agreed with the end that they were trying to achieve, but the means? All they were doing was stirring up more controversy on an already controversy-prone campus. They people that they actually did end up talking to were the ones with strong pro-choice ideas...the ones that can only change their minds through an act of God. But the others, the ones who didn't know what to think, how did they react?
Did the gruesomeness push them away and make them mad at the pro-lifers? Or did it make them think that abortion truly is something horrible? The next edition of the student newspaper will definitely be an interesting one...that at least is for sure.
My stomach turned and I put my spoon down. How can you eat when you're looking at a bloody head held in a pair of tongs? Tears began welling up in my eyes as I watched.
I was situated in a perfect spot. The protesters were out the window to my right, directly in front of me were the stairs coming down from classrooms and the student lounge, and to my left was the cafeteria with student coming in and out with their lunches. I was able to see the reactions of everyone as their vision was assaulted by those horrible images. Some, like me, looked to be on the verge of tears and turned from their lunches in disgust. Others were outraged, and asked,"What are those people doing here?" I even heard a few attempts at jokes, but it was no laughing matter. These pictures showed everyone the true outcome of abortion: a dead baby.
A crowd began to gather near the people. Many argued with them, but others turned their heads as they passed. They couldn't deal with the atrociousness of it, so they "passed by on the other side."
I couldn't decide what to think. I agreed with the end that they were trying to achieve, but the means? All they were doing was stirring up more controversy on an already controversy-prone campus. They people that they actually did end up talking to were the ones with strong pro-choice ideas...the ones that can only change their minds through an act of God. But the others, the ones who didn't know what to think, how did they react?
Did the gruesomeness push them away and make them mad at the pro-lifers? Or did it make them think that abortion truly is something horrible? The next edition of the student newspaper will definitely be an interesting one...that at least is for sure.
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
Car Troubles
You'd think that since my dad is a mechanic, my cars would always run beautifully, right? Not true. Yesterday morning I had my worst morning of the entire quarter so far. Everyone left my house by 7:45; Caleb and Audrey for school, Dad for work, and Mom for jury duty. I had a Spanish quiz, so my plan was to go in early and study at the library. This plan probably saved me much pain...
My car got a flat tire sometime over the weekend and my dad hadn't had a chance to fix it yet. I had no idea how to fix it because I always just think, "Well, why do I need to with a mechanic for a dad?" So the plan was for me to drive the Ford F-150, which hasn't been used since we went camping in August because it's a gas hog. At about 8:00, I walked out to the truck and tried to start it. It wouldn't do anything.
I had expected as much because it hadn't been started in so long, but I still had hoped that it would start. I considered my options. Push the huge truck up the driveway to my car and jump it, push the car with a flat down to the truck, drive the car with a flat down to the truck, or call my dad. Guess which I chose?
It was about 8:20 by the time my dad got there and used a spiffy little machine thing to jump it. Then I sat there and revved the engine so it would warm up. Finally, I decided it had been long enough and put it in reverse. It promptly died. I got out and used the machine which my dad had left to jump it again, then tried to put it in reverse again. No dice. I repeated that process, and then finally jumped it and sat in the truck for about 10 minutes doing the homework I was going to do in the library. Then I tried reverse again, and yet again it died. By this time I was incredibly frustrated and began calling the battery some pretty mean names. (You know, idiotic, moronic, stupid, etc.) I jumped it again and called my dad. "I think you should be able to put it in gear now," he told me.
Great, I thought. It's fine as long as I'm on the gas, but as soon as I brake for a stoplight on the Guide, it's gonna die on me again. Jolly. It was about 8 minutes til nine, and I was beginning to panic. I needed to be to class by 9:30. Again considered my options. I thought of all my friends at school and if they were in class yet or not. Finally I called my friend Caleb who wasn't at school yet, but was at work and needed to be at school at around the same time as me. Even though he was also having car and alarm troubles, he sped out to my house and we got to school at 9:25.
I was so stressed out the rest of the day because of my eventful morning, which is why this is the blog I'm posting rather than the deep and eloquent one I was thinking up over the weekend. Oh well.
My car got a flat tire sometime over the weekend and my dad hadn't had a chance to fix it yet. I had no idea how to fix it because I always just think, "Well, why do I need to with a mechanic for a dad?" So the plan was for me to drive the Ford F-150, which hasn't been used since we went camping in August because it's a gas hog. At about 8:00, I walked out to the truck and tried to start it. It wouldn't do anything.
I had expected as much because it hadn't been started in so long, but I still had hoped that it would start. I considered my options. Push the huge truck up the driveway to my car and jump it, push the car with a flat down to the truck, drive the car with a flat down to the truck, or call my dad. Guess which I chose?
It was about 8:20 by the time my dad got there and used a spiffy little machine thing to jump it. Then I sat there and revved the engine so it would warm up. Finally, I decided it had been long enough and put it in reverse. It promptly died. I got out and used the machine which my dad had left to jump it again, then tried to put it in reverse again. No dice. I repeated that process, and then finally jumped it and sat in the truck for about 10 minutes doing the homework I was going to do in the library. Then I tried reverse again, and yet again it died. By this time I was incredibly frustrated and began calling the battery some pretty mean names. (You know, idiotic, moronic, stupid, etc.) I jumped it again and called my dad. "I think you should be able to put it in gear now," he told me.
Great, I thought. It's fine as long as I'm on the gas, but as soon as I brake for a stoplight on the Guide, it's gonna die on me again. Jolly. It was about 8 minutes til nine, and I was beginning to panic. I needed to be to class by 9:30. Again considered my options. I thought of all my friends at school and if they were in class yet or not. Finally I called my friend Caleb who wasn't at school yet, but was at work and needed to be at school at around the same time as me. Even though he was also having car and alarm troubles, he sped out to my house and we got to school at 9:25.
I was so stressed out the rest of the day because of my eventful morning, which is why this is the blog I'm posting rather than the deep and eloquent one I was thinking up over the weekend. Oh well.
Thursday, October 14, 2004
Who I Am
Philippians 3:12-14 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
What better way to start my blog than my favorite verse--the verse that stirs every part of my soul and encourages me as I daily strive to "press on"! I love this verse not only because me souls thrills to hear it, but also because of the deep truth it contains. This verse reminds me of the very reason I'm here, of the core of my existence, which is taking hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me...for living every day to His glory.
I also love this verse because of the words in it. Words are very important to me and part of the reason I started this blog. I love finding the right word...the word that perfectly encapsulates all I want to say. And this verse found some of those "right" words: straining, forgetting, obtained, take hold, and, most importantly to me, press on. So many times I have to remind myself of the truths this verse contains, and I sum it up in those two words.
There's so much more to who I am, but I'm going to leave it at that, the reason I get out of bed in the morning, the reason I am still on this earth, and even the reason I started this blog: Pressing On.
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